New Year's coming! Grasping hold with authority.

     So, today I've spent some time in the Word, not just with it, as it so often happens. I've just been thinking over the past year and finding holes, missed opportunities and the like, and I've been asking God about what's to be needed of me, of us believers, in 2012. I asked for a word and God kept me circling around authority. Authority is a scary word to most people, and to me in particular, because true authority comes with such a responsibility, a weightiness; It is a service to others and unless we're both properly and fully prepared for it it can be a stumbling block. Prepared means that we are prepared to act in the authority He has given to us and, in that way, to act under the covering of His authority. We can have none of our own - none of ourselves and none of the world's. It is only when we work in tandem with God and have daily dealings and growings in Him that we can walk in it all.

     As previously mentioned, the idea of operating under authority, and more recently His authority, has often overwhelmed me. I've so often tried to live an undercover life. The value and strength found in words has been starkly apparent in my life, and since becoming a Christian that has been reinforced in a desire to speak life and not death into people and situations, knowing and being responsible to the truth found in:

Proverbs 18:21
"Death and life are in the power of the tongue, And those who love it will eat its fruit."

     The responsibility we're going to be feeling in this coming year revolves around the desire for truth. I don't want to operate in a false authority, I want to ensure I'm walking in His giftings. The whys of the importance of authority over the next year elude me, as I can't see His plans but for some fractal imprints, so I've been praying instead for the hows; For the words and patterns and strengths that I'll need to walk it out.  For the verses to carry. I keep landing on the whole of Hebrews 2. At this very moment, I'm stuck like glue to the first verse:

Hebrews 2:1
"For this reason we must pay much closer attention to what we have heard, so that we do not drift away from it."

     It's a simple verse. A beginning. A start. I know that growing in God is not a horizontal growth. He continually builds upon what He has already placed in us. His lessons are foundational. They are reinforced every day simply because they are so obviously true. They are steady because He is our Rock. Our truth. Our love. We become steady in Him, in His Word and in living that Word out. The idea of having to pay 'much closer attention' is wonderous and frightening and monumental to me. We can always learn more about Him, but more so in Him. We can always change, grow, and give more of ourselves away to be filled by Him. Every word finds meaning in Him, every action too. Every verse strengthens our understanding and prepares us for more. Recognizing His work in our lives only makes us yearn for Him more. So, with this verse, with bringing His Words and Works to the surface, to the forefront of our entire beings, we bring Him glory. We hold onto Him alone. We share Him freely. We exhibit the gift of authority He has given to us by salvation - and has opened in us through the maturation of faith - and become more in Him.

     Authority is by no means an easy task, but if this is the word He has for life next year (and beyond - a 'Buzz Lightyear' reminder that everything is foundational), then I'll walk it out. In truth, it's already begun, and though it hurts to stretch in a new way (and that won't stop), I'd rather grow in God than get stuck in a standstill, because standstills always happen over quicksand, and I'll not put myself in a position where I'd grow distant from the Lord. That's why my encouragement is found in holding Him tight by: paying 'much closer attention', praying, reading His Word, putting on His armour, and just by simply (and complexly and fully) loving like He does. I think that the biggest change to be brought in 2012 is that I'll be more open about living that out - in living Him out.

     More on the fullness of Hebrews 2 later... because I'm stuck on it all. Until then, I'll be writing next in the New Year. 2012: bring it.

Picture Cruising

I was looking through some of the blogs I follow and found this picture:

From http://designismine.blogspot.com from someone else.

     I really like it. I like that it says semblance. I like that the whole reason for this blog is to not live that. To not be broken up and patched together, but instead to be mended and made whole in God. Guess I liked the reminder of what this really little internet space means to me - just what I'm working in and through and towards. 

     The world has broken people in it - so many people - and it likes it - in so many ways it makes it easier to attack and 'understand' and ignore them - us  - it's complex, but we call it simple - so that we don't have to deal. It's much harder to attack and 'understand' and ignore those who are saved and healed and mended and whole - people try - but it's so not of this world. I guess that's the point, or rather, it's how we become the arrows that point towards the God who saves. It's impossible to do that alone, or by our strength, instead it has to be His...

1 Peter 5:10-11

"After you have suffered for a little while, the God of all grace, who called you to His eternal glory in Christ, will Himself perfect, confirm, strengthen and establish you. To Him be dominion forever and ever. Amen."

     Wow - Amen it is. This verse is what it means to be whole to me. To struggle, most assuredly, but to be set apart and to be changed in God. To follow clear directions - because God's voice is always clear and firm and unshakable when we are willing to listen - and then to be like an arrow for others just because we know that all that love, well, it's for all and also all for Him.

Surely... not a "don't call me Shirley" airplane reference (that movie's not cool enough to make it further than right here)... longest title of one of my posts EVER... I could go on... it's longer than what I had to say... I added this later... because mobile Blogger tried to kill my ""'s... EPIC fail... I showed them...

Blessed. By God. Surely. His first words to us, in Genesis 1: 28, as well as in so many other places in the Bible, such as this:

His forever promise. His words stay the same. He is steady. He is our Rock. Forever promises are the very best - especially because God is outside of time and in this promise he swears it to us by Himself - He actually backs this promise - doubly ours! Wow. The service tonight: The Fullness of His Blessing

Pressed in to Pressing on. Out of the box and on with the walk.

     Sunday's service was about healing. Basically about living the full life that God has given to us. It's been awhile since I've been fully in service. See, as I've mentioned before I've been taking the membership course at Third Day on Wednesdays. This coming Wednesday is the last class. It's been great, but this next step, as with all steps closer to living fully for God, has brought up different attacks from the enemy. I've just been pressed in. That's what I pulled out of the services. Pastor was talking about being oppressed and even depressed. It made me think on the picture I had of that box in August.

     I started sketching out the different pressures that keep us, or at least me, in that box. Mostly it was me and the enemy attacking my many weaknesses - through doubts, fears, pains, expectations others have for me, my own expectations, and my own plans. How quickly I forget to put on the full armour of God and see the world fractally through Him. I'll be really honest with you - I don't often struggle in situations - my life works, and I haven't suffered through different problems - it's just been surfacely good. That's guilt inducing, because when I do struggle, it's internally and I always feel horrible about struggling against nothing, even though it is much to me. Growing in God is painful and I'll never say that the Christian walk is easy, but it's always worth it. It's painful in the moment - there's no denying that, but always we can look back and see the growth in our walks. I look back at my life before God and am astounded. Every time. I don't know how I survived, but for His hand in my life and in the moments I grasped for Him without even knowing Him. But again, since I've been saved not much has changed surfacely. I have changed - can't even tell you or express how much, but still, I want to be more in Him. Isn't that what living for God is all about? In all times and all seasons I will live for God. By putting on the armour daily we protect that choice. I need to pray all the time - all through my day, so that it's His instead. I don't want to forget these things, so as this year comes to a close, I'm going to press onward - out of the box - and put an increased effort into putting on God's armour. I'm going to declare it daily, because He heals all of us fully - and I need to remind myself to let Him and to protect the works He has done, is doing, and will do in me. I am His.

Ephesians 6:10-18
"Finally, be strong in the Lord and in the strength of His might. Put on the full armor of God, so that you will be able to stand firm against the schemes of the devil. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the powers, against the world forces of this darkness, against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places. Therefore, take up the full armor of God, so that you will be able to resist in the evil day, and having done everything, to stand firm. Stand firm therefore, having girded your loins with truth, and having put on the breastplate of righteousness, and having shod your feet with the preparation of the gospel of peace; in addition to all, taking up the shield of faith with which you will be able to extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. With all prayer and petition pray at all times in the Spirit, and with this in view, be on the alert with all perseverance and petition for all the saints"

--> Such encompassing verses. To live like this is to move forward, such as the verse of this year. Taking it up more determinedly:

Philippians 3:13-14
"Brethren, I do not regard myself as having laid hold of it yet; but one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and reaching forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus."

--> That's the only kind of pressing I want to do.

Position.

     It's been awhile. Quite awhile... well... quite awhile for a writer to not write. I've always thought of myself as a writer, a reader, a word person, a storyteller. I've always been protective of those titles though. Never wanted to say them out loud. Never have. I always deemed it as 'too risky' to share... too close to the vest... always needed to protect my identity... who I am inside the bubble of what I appear to be. I do that with pretty much everything... it's one of the things that makes living for Christ so difficult. See, He loves the real me... He made the real me... then I stepped in. I protected, changed, and lost. He whittles us down though - He's not really a fan of fluff and stuff. He gets us down to a child of His - that's when we can really live and love like Jesus. I never really connected that with the whole hopes and dreams bandwagon, but it's a total God tandem...  as with everything in this fractal world. There are things that have been put aside, others that have been put down, and still more that have been railroaded for my protection. I'm getting ahead of myself... too far.

     Tonight I wanted to write something small, but something big too. See, I've been struggling with some stuff lately - stuff that is small that I've let get big. It's important, but actually not. This has all been my preface (sorry about that). Lately I think I've just let them hit hard - and refused to deal. Tonight though, I had too. In the membership course at the Church. Not that I had too, don't get the wrong idea about that (:0), but that it was time I started to deal. I did. I still am. It'll take some time. Anyways, in confronting some things, God gave me a picture in my head, actually it was a reel. It was me in a house, lying on the ground, looking up through this telescopic window (?). I was looking at the stars, or at least I was trying too, but the light pollution was too bad. The lens just kept zooming closer, until I finally (like after a reaaaaallllllly long time) got a clear picture of those stars. At first I tried to analyze the scene... I failed... I always do that way, because there's no way I could know. Then, God just told me. I was where I put myself and the zoomed close-up version... that was where He wanted me. He's working on that... mostly because I'm finally letting Him. One step at a time.

     I really didn't want to write this. I really didn't want to think. I really distracted myself from Church until now so that I wouldn't have to write this... so that I could pull a 'I have to sleep' excuse out. He really wouldn't let me. So, all I can tell you is that God's working and all I can really share are the three verses that hit me hardest today:

2 Corinthians 11:14
"And it is no wonder, for satan himself masquerades as an angel of the light"

--> I've been praying about this - about the light pollution that I saw. See, light pollution is man-made, and it only masks. It reminded me of the follies of the world - of the things we attempt to do without Him and of the things we try to let take God's place... none of which will produce anything capable of even withstanding His presence, or any fruit of any kind. This I know - satan cannot create, at most, he can deceive, but getting close to God, means shedding those lies, because:

John 1:4-5

"In Him was Life, and the Life was the Light of men. And the Light shines on in the darkness, for darkness has never overpowered it [put it out or absorbed it or appropriated it, and is unreceptive to it]."

--> Just wow.

As for the last one - Pastor Edith gave us these sheets with verses about God's Glory Light, and this was the first on the list:

Genesis 1:16

"And God made the two great lights- the greater light (the sun) to rule the day and the lesser light (the moon) to rule the night. He also made the stars. 

--> I didn't read that verse until after. Stars have always been important to me. I always thought of God when I looked at them. As early as I can remember, I remember that. I love them. They've been promises to me. This verse reminded me of that. I can see the sun and the moon so clearly, whenever I wish, but not so with the stars... there's a timing about them... a lining up... a fractalness.  To me, this verse holds the wonders of what He'll show us... if we let Him. 

Words out. I am getting some shut eye this early early morning.

Oh... and here's that 'God and light and warmth' triumph video I love... just because... I'll post this again and again...

More Versedness.

I want this as a mural on a wall one day...

Colossians 2:6-7
"And now, just as you accepted Christ Jesus as your Lord, you must continue to follow Him. Let your roots grow down into Him, and let your lives be built on Him. Then your faith will grow strong in the truth you were taught, and you will overflow with thankfulness."

--> Love this, yet another set of letters from the Word. Amazing how much they mean. All.

Reminder

Colossians 1:23
"But you must continue to believe this truth and stand firmly in it. Don't drift away from the assurance you received when you heard the Good News. The Good News has been preached all over the world, and I, Paul have been appointed as God's servant to proclaim it."

--> To grab the Good News is a daily grab. With it, we remember who we are in Christ. Firmly. Take the truth and cement it. I love this. It's been windy outside these past few autumn days - it has reminded me how important it is to be grounded. In Him and nothing else, because everything of worth is found in the steps we take in Him.

Church time. Got to go!